Dating Sites! - The Things That Upset Me Like There's No Tomorrow, series

Hello again everybody! Welcome to my second installment of, "The things that get under my skin like there's no tomorrow", series. Today I decided to direct my anger towards dating sites. It seems kind of fitting, seeing how Valentine's Day is right around the corner and all. As well, I hate dating sites with such a passion, that it couldn't be measured on any scale known to man!

So let's get right down to it!

Dating sites, a giant conglomeration of used-up's, has been's, never will be's, and scammers! "But what about the people who are truly looking for love?"

"I'll get to them, ya fool! Now go off and mind your own while I talk about some of the crappiest crap to ever hit the internet!"

Dating sites are classified in many different categories. You got your typical laid back approach, where you can search other singles and try to find dates. There are the sites designed for people looking specifically for soul mates and marriage. The meet and mate, and then lose my e-mail address, sites. The paid sites, free sites, and free until you actually join them, sites. Married people who want lovin on the side. Plus there are even fetish sites, and in this day and age, I wouldn't be surprised if you'd come across a site that advertises, "Animal's seeking humans, for intimate encounters!"

That last one would have to be run by PETA...... haha!

I think I'll start with the Adult Friend Finder type sites!

Meaning: places where people are looking for some high quality! You know, some mud for the duck! Bushy Ganushi for the skin soldier??? Oh heck, people looking for sex!

Well to start with, these places all charge you to be a member. "Hmm, a site that charges money, to solicit sex." Let me run that one by you once more. A site makes you pay money, so that you can interact with others, purely looking for sex! When you take out all the other words, except for the underlined ones, you get, "pay money for sex". Oh what's the word I'm looking for here? Oh, I remember, selling sex for money is prostitution! Wow, a crime punishable by law. One that has numerous forms of punishment, including multiple lengths of prison sentences, and fines, and even a spot on the evening news if you're lucky! Good stuff if you want to make your parents super proud, and give them dinner talk for when the neighbors are over! "Shoo-wee! You see Tina on the TV for sellin her tata, to some o dem boys, down yonder? She sure knows how to make us simple folk proud! And she looked real purdy too!....Yee-Haw!"

These sites seem like nothing more that a load of B.S. They are one of the biggest types of sites out there to post false profiles. These are "eye catchers" that depict very attractive people, usually shown in the nude, who are looking for a good time, with no strings attached. You can be the best looking person in the world and you won't get a response from these people, because they aren't real people!

Another tactic that is heavily used by these sites is, "paying people to pose". Again, these are profile's of people who are very attractive. These people are paid, by the owners of the sites, to create a profile, and to interact with the other members. This helps to cut down people's views of the site, posting dummy articles. These people may, or may not, use their own photo's. They will also prey upon the other sites, especially the VERY few free sites, and try to lure people to the sex sites.

Craigslist personals are loaded with these types of people. After a few email exchanges, they will give you a dumb reason like, "I have been scammed by people who tried to send me to a sex site. It has made me cautious. So if you are for real, use the link in this email, and go create a profile. There we can exchange, more intimate photos, and get to know each other better." And guess what the link is? One to a paid site! These people score a small commission off of each member they get to join. Plus, once you do join, you will come to find, that the person who sent you to the site, doesn't even have a profile.

These sites use computer programs to send mail to users, and are referred to as "robots". All in all, they are tailored to your desires, based on your profile, and what you are looking for. They come across like they are real, and they can keep some desperate people, paying for repeat memberships, for a long time. Especially if they choose someone from a different state, and say all the perfect things, to keep their attention and hopes up.

Finally, these sites are places where prostitution is showing up. Members use the sites to help them bring in business. This is a way to help them stay low profile, and under the police radar. It keeps them off of the street corners, and allows them to choose safe quarters, where the act can go down.

Free dating sites!

For starters, I'd like to complain about all the sites that advertise, "free", and never live up to it. Sure, some of them will let you create a profile, some might even let you read mail. But they won't let you respond to the mail for free. These sites, will pull some of the same tactics as the sex sites. They use false profiles, created by employees of the site, to send mail to the people who haven't upgraded to a paying membership yet. The attempt is to make them think that plenty of attractive men or women what them. Usually these non-paying members, receive an overwhelming amount of emails daily.

These sites also forbid you from adding private contact info to your profile. They will delete you if you break these rules. But the funny part is, that they will constantly send you email after you have been thrown off of the site. The letters will come from random people, who want you to join the site, so you can meet up with them. They will also forward you email address to similar sites, and you will get spam-ed out the... backside!

As far as the actual free sites go, I don't know of many. There is the giant one that just about everyone has heard of. "Sorry, I don't feel like giving them a plug!" Then there are a few knock off sites. The big and popular, free one, lets you do everything for free. Upgrading, means you spend points that you acquired through actions taken on the site. The smaller knock offs, offer similar services, but they are pretty crappy overall, and have a lot fewer members.

User points are given for communication with others, and participation in the forums. They can be used to give your profile page a theme, or to send a gift to another member. Such as a rose picture, or a picture of, a box of candy.

Considering that the site is free, there isn't much bad that can be said about it, unless you happen to be me! I can always find a way to complain about anything out there!

I pulled a stint on this free site. The big one. I was on it for around a year and a half. It was one of the most disappointing moments of my life. First off, I come to find that there are tons of profiles on the site, that belong to users who are no longer active. You are able to see the last time that they were on the site, by adding them to your favorites list. It's quite discouraging to find someone you really compare well to, and come to find that they aren't even looking for love anymore.

There are way too many people who post outdated photos of themselves on their profiles. So when you meet them, they come across as a big disappointment. To me, that's false advertising. They will also lie about their professions, their motives, their status, "single or married", kids, their habits, and their traits. So basically, people will lie about whatever, just to try and come across as someone worth dating. Or, in reality, so they can get you in the sack!

I believe that some of the women join these sites with the biggest hopes... In the beginning!. Maybe they are sick and tired of men. They might think, that a site is a good way to express exactly what they want. This way, they won't have to deal with people who want to play games, or the ones who aren't sure what they want.

Once they join, their intentions might be pure. Maybe their self esteem is a little bruised, but it all changes after a week or two! They post a profile and get tons of hits from single guys who think they are hot. It goes to their heads, and it changes them. Now they aren't in a big hurry to settle down. "With so many guys to choose from, I can't just settle for the first one I meet. I have to date around a little to find the perfect one." Makes sense, until...

Well, why not take it a step further? Sex, plays such a huge role in relationships these days, that you almost have to see how they are in bed first. Coming across Mr. Wonderful, dude who says all the right things, looks like a chiseled out sculpture, and kisses like his lips, were the reason that kissing was even invented! The last thing you want, is to find out that he sucks in the sack, or that he has a "circus peanut", for his "Johnny Wilcox", instead of giant, "pleasure vibe 5,000"!

The result, is that girls will send a few emails, then start tossing out the naked photos, and finally end up on that first date... where they end up putting out! In the following days, the guy will either get cut off completely, or just shoved to the side, while she goes out to test a few new guys. He might not notice it, but her attention towards him, will decrease a good bit. Maybe an email every other day, rather than four of five a day.

People will use the site as an easy way to get a lot of dates, without doing hardly any work. In public, girls don't get hit on as often as they would on a site, simply because men aren't sure if they are single or not. These sites let you advertise that you are single, after that, you really don't even need to write a profile.

The biggest thing of all that upsets me, is the way people use the site to help them find their new flavor of the week! I can't tell you how many times I met a girl on a dating site, who claimed she wanted a great guy, who didn't play games, and wasn't out for a booty call. These same girls would be all over me on a first date, and of coarse we would finish it in the sack. Then after a few days, I would stop hearing from them all together.

"What guy is gonna complain, that a chick pulled a one nighter on him?" OK, I'll agree with you there. I am a guy, and I'm not gonna refuse a lovely lady, who wants to give me some mud for the duck! Even if she wants it on the first date. It's not that I don't have standards, or that I don't prefer to wait for a while first. It's that, I'm a guy, and guys don't turn down intimacy, from an attractive "femininity".

And no, "femininity", is not a made up word. However, I do make up my own words all the time, like, "rocket ship!" OK, I didn't make that word up, but I promise you, that my meaning for it, is a lot different than the one you will find in a dictionary! haha!

I won't complain about easy sex, and I probably won't turn it down, but it will disappoint me. I went to a site looking for a real relationship, and I ended up finding the same thing, that I could find in a bar. That is disappointing. But the thing that got me the most, was well after I had grown fed up with the site, and quit logging in. I came back a year later, and the same girls who were prowling it everyday, logging in a couple of times a day, were still on the prowl.

They would have the profiles that said, "looking for a long term relationship", and here they were, still out looking for that guy. They were all logging in a few times a day, same as they were doing a year ago. "Well maybe they just haven't found the right guy yet." Uh huh, and that's why each one of my friends from the site, have slept with each one of those girls, that have been prowling it everyday, for the past four years! So if ALL the guy regulars, have slept with ALL the girl regulars, and ALL of them have been playing on the site, everyday, for the past four years... What does that tell you?

These sites are built around mass deception, even though it may not be the intentions of the site's creator. I'm not going to write about all the various ones out there in detail. I will also admit that I have never paid to join any version of a dating site. My research done on the adult sites, came from friends who have tried it, and numerous warnings that I have found posted on the internet.

There could very well be some great sites out there. E-harmony is a giant, paid dating site. I don't know anything about it, and even though the spokesman comes across, like a guy who would offer little kids the chance to pet his puppy, in efforts to lure them over to his creepy white van, with no windows... It may be worth a try. Me personally, I can't get past the annoying sound, of his super friendly voice. It sounds like he's constantly has a giant burp stuck in his throat, the type that comes from downing a can of creme soda too fast.

All that aside, I do know of a few people who found great relationships, and even marriage from dating sites. So it is possible, I suppose. I just can't see any of it turning into true love. People don't start out their dating lives by joining a site. They mingle in public, flirt, find attraction. Play the game, where you think that someone is interested in you, but you aren't completely sure. So you have a certain type of fear when you approach them.

Let's not forget about flirting! Gosh, that's half the fun of it. So is, going out on a few dates, or just hanging out with someone, and trying to get to know them. The feeling you get when you're walking alongside someone in a park. Your hands keep bumping into each others'. Then there's the tingle that hits you, the first time you interlock your fingers with them. That's the kind of magic that makes dating special. It's the good parts of a relationship, that get cut out, by a dating site. And as much as I enjoy seeing a nude picture of a girl, that I have never seen in the nude before, it takes away from the discovery process. It ruins the element of surprise, when you get to know someone, inside and outside, through email.

In closing,

I'd like to say that I'm not knocking on dating sites, or the people who use them to find their soul mate. My personal experiences with them have been awful. In general, I can't stand the whole idea of them. and this article is merely an expression of my feelings of hatred towards them, along with some helpful advice on things to look out for.

There is no easy solution to love. Many people end up settling for less than they are worth, or even just settling, for the sake of settling. Maybe they want a family, and that biological clock is ticking louder to them, each day. In these cases, love takes a backseat to comfort ability.

Let's be real here! By the time most people hit thirty, they have fallen into, and out of, love, so many times, that it just doesn't have that "pop" anymore. Once you combine that to the world of online dating, and you lose the discovery process... The relationship will lack a punch from the get go. And we can all probably agree, that the best sex in a relationship, is in it's first few weeks. Part of that, is finding out what your lover likes, and discovering the unique things that they do in bed. Yet another thing you could stand losing, if you speak about it in emails first.

Side note, because you know I can't write an article without mentioning them!...

-400 pound blobs of humanity, who chug around the grocery store, in electric shopping carts, because they are too lazy to walk, can benefit highly from the use of dating sites. Considering that they are too lazy to walk, I'd bank on the fact that they are also, too lazy to go out and mingle at the bars. Plus I haven't seen any bars that are, "electric shopping cart", accessible.

One can enjoy the comfort of their jumbo lazy boy, "bought and paid for by YOUR hard-earned tax dollars", that comes equipped with a built in mini-fridge, while they play around on the sites. Here it can also, steal an image of attractive looking Russian women, from the "marry a foreign bride" sites, and post it as their own image, to attract quality letters of interest. For the blob knows, that it will never be confronted, and seen for what it really is, on a first date. Because they are too lazy to leave the house, to go on a first date!

Blobs could also consider joining the fetish related sites! Many people, "and who knows why!", enjoy making sweet love, to a jumbo, super human. Plus there are plenty of people who really get off on having sex with midgets and circus freaks!

A blob can add plenty of enjoyment to it's day, by joining some of these sites. It will really help out, during those hours of the day when OPRAH isn't on. Plus it will help keep them content, and a content blob, is slightly less likely to attack you, for taking the last box of ding dongs off of the store shelf.... "Slightly!"